But, I'm sure he realizes that I love him because I saved him from the horrible fish keeper at Walmart. He was living in a little 16 oz. tub thing and swimming amongst all his own poop. Also, the mean fish guy scared the crap out of me while I was tapping on the glass. He came out of nowhere whilst I was innocently trying to get the little fishies to move around with my love taps and said, "Do you know what happens when you tap on the glass?!" and proceeded to show me a bag of five or six dead fish. I ran and hid behind Michael. Not one of my proudest moments, but that fish guy was a JERK and I reverted to my girlie ways in a moment of desperation. That guy was a little too passionate about the fish he kept. Another example of this was when the other old guy that works at Walmart (there are only two) came to help us with the fish and was going to let Michael get his own fish out but old guy number one comes running and screaming (slight exaggeration) around the corner shouting, "You can't do that sir! You know better!" to the other old guy. Then old guy number one says to us, "The only way he'd be any dumber is if he were bigger!" What a bastard! (Don't worry, I don't get it either.)
A day later, my fish is living happily on my entertainment center despite my tapping and he's happy to be free of the weirdies at Walmart. Because I don't care what you say, all the weirdies work at Walmart. It's one of those things we don't like to talk about but that we all know. That and Dairy Queen. (Yes, I'm aware that one day I will be out of work and forced to work at either Walmart or Dairy Queen or both because of that comment, but it's a sacrfice I'm willing to make.)
My current jam is: Best I Ever Had by Drake (I recommend the edited version if you have small children or Mormons around).